I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
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