so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
I just hit 3 trees and a golf cart.. all on the same hole
Put me down for a bogey
Randomize
