I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
either way he was missing a nipple.
You'll be proud of me
Who did you not have sex with
Damn it...you know me too well
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
Randomize
