I need to stop coming to work sober
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
if I could send you my dick right now I would. that's how good of a friend I am.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
the only reason I'm still sleeping with him is to get the university's secure wifi password
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
Randomize
