that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Is it frowned upon to puke at Keeneland while you're betting on horses or is it just whatev
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
I'll send you pictures of my nipples so you don't feel left out.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
He literally had a Trump sign in his front yard. I just can't now.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
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