I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
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