dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
His birthday is on fathers day. I know its a cruel coincedence but this is too funny to pass up.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
