I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
also I just used a straw to drink the juice out of a tomato b/c I forgot how to bite.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
"willing to pay anyone fun whos willing to hang out and laugh at my jokes while my friends are MIA" is this to desperate?
i went out at 5pm and cant remember anything until 3am...i was at the bus stop parking lot running around doing the Arrested Development chicken calls.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize