Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
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