then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Why is there a waffle in the knife drawer?
The real question is why are there knives in the waffle drawer.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
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