So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
Turns out, it's impolite to repeatedly request Seal "Kiss From a Rose" at bars
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Randomize
