I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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