the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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