similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
Yeah I'm just gonna shower and drink a gallon of coffee and drunkenly write my research paper. It'll be fine
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Just did the "lost my phone, need #'s" post and I got a text saying "go ahead and save me as Ashley-DD because I know you will anyway. I think I love her.
And then he peed in my hair
Randomize
