i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
So I've been thinking about this, and I've decided my bed is magic. Every time I change the sheets, a new boy is in my bed. I own the Sheets of Dreams-if I change them, they will come.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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