What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
I would rather contract a disease that would eat me from the inside out and make me suffer painfully while it slowly killed me than to put myself through the 20 minutes of agony that is having sex with you ever ever again.
I think you're talking dirty but I'm not sure???
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
Randomize
