I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
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