You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
If the cops knock on your door and ask if you saw anyone throw an orange out the window I was never there.
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
you said something about joining a k-pop band before passing out topless on the trampoline.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
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