Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
I just spilled a shot of Patron on your mom.. Body shots may be happening. You better get here quick.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
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