rhymes with "ouble enetration"
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
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