is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
Friday is the holy day of drinking. Thou shalt observe the Sabbath. It's in the bible. Look it up bitch.
Googling enemas while I get a pedicure ... My life in one senence
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
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