its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
You pretended to pelvic thrust my mother on the boat while my 92 year old grandmother looked on. Thanks.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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