It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
sunday morning discovery: something purple, smelly, and sticky my hair. any suggestions?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Girl walking by was talking on the phone about how he needed to write a gratitude list in her letter to god this week. Too stoned
So I just chugged the rest of the wine in my mug so I would have something to eat my corn flakes in. With a plastic fork. I need a dishwasher
And maybe a life coach?
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
He stumbled out of the bathroom with his pants around his ankles yelling "tie my shooes!"
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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