He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
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Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
I need to find a more grown up way of dealin with a hangover at the office than pringles and mountain dew at 8:30 am...
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Our office went out together for the first time to celebrate the fact our coworker got fired.