If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
i just watched kanye west and taylor swift have a chugging contest. why cant halloween be every day
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
It was at the same house, but a different party, when lesbians set me on fire. So there's that.
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
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