I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
I feel I should make it clear.....I'm not stalking you, I'm stalking ur dick. You don't even need to talk when you get here. At 4am I think we'd both prefer that anyway.
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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