are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
life lesson learned today: sleeping pills and laxatives don't mix.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
We should invent fake asshair for you to wear so you can experience my pain for a day.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
He saw one of my bras on the floor and said "damn you could eat soup out of this"
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
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