Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
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My mom can no longer prohibit me from smoking pot..I sell to her boyfriend.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
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I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
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