okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
It just hit me that i made out with someone's mom last night
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Randomize
