Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
He has a really nice penis but its like a model that wasn't built to scale
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
If I ever write a book, i'm calling it "why do i work with fucktards?"
It'll be a good sequel to my other book, "why do i sleep with fucktards?"
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
Randomize