Hahaha figures, hmm should I spank you? Or throw a cow at you?
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
Is it sad that I find it completely normal that I just took batteries out of a vibrator to put them in a pencil sharpener so I could do homework?
I find this completely acceptable.
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Just puked most of my soul out..
Randomize
