we're getting ready to take strippers to breakfast. I love my life.
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I'm hiding out in the living room until he falls back asleep. If he catches a whiff of my tits, it's all over. I just need to play it cool. Babies can smell fear
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Randomize