While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Just got a Lifeproof case for Christmas so hold on and tell me how my shower nudes look
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
Randomize
