thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
You tried to ride his dick and fell off. Then tried to ride the floor. That's why he hasn't called back
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
