yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
when i told him i was pregnant with his baby he texted me 'congradulations'
i pity the fetus.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
It felt like he was juggling my kidneys with the head of his penis... If you could even call it that, it was more like a lochness monster. Huge and mythical.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
2 six inch heels, 3 big sangrias, no broken legs
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Randomize