I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
i think i scared a bird with my dick
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize