you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
I'm gagging in the liquor aisle just thinking about how much alcohol I'll be drinking this weekend.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
If you come home and I'm pantsless with cake smeared all over my face, I'm sorry.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
It's called life, you pretentious bitch. Grow up.
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
