Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
I'd love to come and give you a massage, but we already duck taped my keys to the ceiling...
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Revised rule: don't put your dick in the general vacinity of mental instability.
Not even dry humping. Not even a little bit.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
No. I'm too high for this. I gotta focus my mind for my future Hooter's interview
also i think i should join the bone marrow registration when im sober
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
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