I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
Problem: At home sick with a stomach virus. Solution: smoke weed all day...
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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