therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
Randomize
