xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
And then I'm going to yell into her vagina and see if it echoes
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
Randomize
