i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
his tattoo said carpe diem which i thought was ironic considering his epilepsy
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
Randomize