My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
I looked into her soul, didn't I?
You eye-fucked her soul.
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