We were hooking up, both of us naked. She starts putting her clothes back on and says, "I have to go to the bathroom." I reply, "No you don't, you're leaving." Without hesitation she looks at me and says, "Yeah."
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
I don't know what the fuck is in the water in New Hampshire, but these dicks are HUGE.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
he came during what was supposed to be the foreplay blowjob. there goes my evening.
Just reintroduced tequila back into my life...so that's happening
YAS SHES BACK AND BETTER THAN EVER
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
Watching the awkward tinder date at the table next to mine is the most action I've had in months, so there's that.
aloe plants are like gummy bears with an exoskeleton, but with healing powers instead of deliciousness.
are you on the drugs???
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
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