PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
The last thing I remembered was laying in the bathtub fully clothed with the shower running while he was picking grilled cheese out of my hair. I couldn't figure out if i was more upset about being soaking wet or the fact that my grilled cheese was in my hair instead of my mouth.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
Alright I'd bang a 4 sober, It's been like 3-4 weeks or how ever long 4th of July was ago. I wanna fuck something.
4th of July was 12 days ago. The date is literally in the text you just sent.
I don't care about the dates I just wanna bone something.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
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