Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I like when I have the chance to say normal things like 'I know her from college' vs 'I did a ton of blow with her one night at Studio B.'
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
Her life is filled with shit luck. Its like mother nature is having her period and just taking it out on her specifically.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I made people serenade her before talking to her and went on a condom run. If I'm going to be in the friend zone, I'm going to be its fucking king.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
I just wrote the Drag Queen from Saturday Night on FB and apologized for licking her. Weirdest thing I have ever typed...
Randomize