you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
I accidentally screamed the wrong name last night. He stopped for a second, said "fuck it, you're too hot to care," and then continued fucking me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize