i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I'm so tired of dating women who lie about their age. You show up feeling like you need to follow them around with a dust pan and a broom.
she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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