SEEEEXXX PLEASE
He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
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