she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Do you have feelings for this penis?
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
